I wanna bring you to show and tell
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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