Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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