it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
