so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
