He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize