She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
