I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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