So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
