Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
