All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Randomize
