Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
