Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
