So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
