i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
