Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
