Sacagawea was the original milf.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
