I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at about main and main street
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
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