Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
the condom got lost in my hair
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Randomize