No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Randomize
