what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
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