forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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