Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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