no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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