so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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