I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
