no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
