He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
