Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
she pinky promised me she was 18
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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