No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
