nut hugger
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
