id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
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