I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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