this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
