Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
