whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Randomize
