question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
