I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Randomize
