She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
