Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
His hands were made for my vagina.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Randomize
