It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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