My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize