we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
