your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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