That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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