I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize