Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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