If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Randomize