Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
