Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
