You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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