Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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